To Be Sober

"That they may teach the young women to be sober...."

Titus 2:4-5 is an instruction to older women on what they are to teach the younger women. The first of that is "to be sober." Knowing words can have many meanings, let's look up the word "sober".

The 1828 Webster's Dictionary defines "sober" as the following:

1. Temperate in the use of spirituous liquors; habitually temperate

2. Not intoxicated or excited by spirituous liquors

3. Not mad or insane; not wild, visionary, or heated with passion; exercising cool, dispassionate reason; self-controlled; self-possessed

Further, let's define "temperate":

1. Moderate; not excessive

2. Not marked with passion; not violent; cool; calm

So, the first thing we are to be, as godly women, is sober. We are to be temperate in all things, not mad or wild, but cool and calm. Regardless of one's view on alcohol, we are instructed by scripture to be sober, not intoxicated by spirituous liquors.

Another view of "sober" is being habitually temperate. If being temperate means that one is not mad, wild, or insane, than to be sober means we are to be self-controlled and thoughtful of our decisions and judgement.

Debi Pearl states in her book, Created to Be His Helpmeet, that "a sober wife is one who faces the fact that she is no longer a freewheeling individual, with time to do as she pleases. She knows that marriage is a joyous, but also a grave responsibility. She cannot be flighty or frivolous. She makes a commitment to be the best wife, mother, and manager of the home that anyone could be." She further states that, "Her most basic responsibility is to make her husband's home run smoothly. She assumes the role of coordinator of all affairs.....When a woman soberly considers the needs, time schedule, and resources of her home, then she will be a more efficient helpmeet."

Wow, I like that...."a more efficient helpmeet". I remember when I was newly married with small children, how I ran my house...if you could call it that. I was more like a babysitter. I would plop my rear in front of my soaps, in between feeding children and changing diapers, giving no thought to dinner, laundry, or just about anything other than passing the time. I would hardly call that sober. Being sober requires thought. Let me say that again....Being sober requires thought. Thinking about supper before it's 5 o'clock and the children are starving....thinking about the laundry before your husband has no clean clothes for work....thinking about cleaning the house before an unexpected guest shows up at your door....(Been there, done all of them!)

If I'm to be sober, I must have a plan. A recovering alcoholic can't just haphazardly walk into a bar. He's got to know where he's going, what his plan is. I might not be a recovering alcoholic...more like a recovering slacker-mom. I know where I've been, and it ain't pretty!! In order to not return to the chaos, I must have a plan. If I walked into a paid job and frivolously went about my day, I'd be out of there in a heartbeat. Doesn't my family deserve better than a frivolous mom?

So, sober up ladies! This week we are going to talk about how to be sober women. What does that look like in our homes and how can we apply that to our lives. No more "slacker-moms", we're on the road to recovery. And don't worry, if you fall of the wagon I'll probably be down there too...we can use each other as a boost to get back up again. See you in the wagon!!